When Albert Pujols left the Cardinals to sign with the Angels in December 2011, everyone wondered how things would go. Would the Cardinals bomb, and the Angels rise? Or would the Cardinals excel with young, cheaper talent, while the Angels suffered under Pujols’ mammoth, $254 million deal?
Well, now that the Pujols-is-not-on-the-Cardinals era is officially over, let’s evaluate how it went for everybody! We’ll gloss over his brief time with the Dodgers, instead opting to consider how humanity itself fared during this time.
Cardinals
World Championships: Zero
Times Cardinals fans said “I wish we still had Pujols”: One billion (approximately)
Angels
World Championships: Zero
Times Angels fans said “I wish we didn’t have Pujols”: One billion (approximately)
Humanity
World Championships: N/A
Covid deaths: 5.9 million
Conclusion: The Pujols deal was a disaster for everyone. Thank goodness the situation has been rectified. Welcome home, Albert!
